Title: Prisoner of Love
Fandom: KAT-TUN.
Couples Marudo.
Gender: Ang, romance. Fanfiction
Rating: PG-17
Summary: Ueda believed that he could not suffer anymore.
Note (s) from the Author: This is the brother Shot "Distance " created by Tawsuna. Born of a game 1 month, and is so disgustingly sad ... I do not think
apologize xD Disclaimer: no mine Kat-tun, even more so, if their lives within the fic.
Prisoner of Love
CHT MLXC
- Yes
How likely it was that this was a bad dream? Few, very few.
I saw him looking down and frowning brow dramatically.
"You're lying ... it shows.
"No, you're wrong this time
Tatsuya ... I'm telling the truth.
eyes went up posarlos in mine, and truth in them I burned as red-hot needles.
could not be true.
sighed defeated by the situation & oacute; ny turned away.
"Do not go .- I asked as I felt like I really pounded the brain, stunning.
"No need to stay, we have nothing more to discuss.
- Will not you give me a reason?
"I thought you had given.
- I mean a reason to believe ... I know you're lying .- I heard him snort.
- Goodbye Tatsuya. Even
turned to speak, I continued to deny his face and started walking. I wish I could take it from the back of his jacket, hanging from his waist, or ponermea scream as long as it stops, but my body would not move, even though I ordered it.
The edges of my peripheral vision began to get black, and cloud. His silhouette up a spot became uniform. I felt a sharp pain in the knees when I fell over them, but I ignored it, did not compare to the pain I was feeling in the heart at that moment, a pain so I could imagine tearing my vital body hanging in shreds and inert valves that held him.
I closed my eyes tightly, realizing that he could not o & iacute; r his footsteps, I could not smell her perfume, could not feel his presence.
- Yuichi ... - I like a dirty word, making the sound bitter by rumbling inside my brain.
2 years after
was not like me invading alien space without the consent of the person, but Jin did not think that bothered him.
I went into the locker room of the gym, owned by the city court.
My friend, Akanishi Jin, was a professional football player. Was very good indeed! In the last year I hab & iacute; to be aware that his team had risen, and I dropped to say hello. Just waiting to receive me without asking too many questions ... I do not think he could answer none.
I walked through the halls, and a deafening laughter made me stop me, one of which was that of Jin. I peered at the curve that was on my left and I met several guys who were joking wrapped in towels.
- Oh. Who are you? - One of them asked after noticing my presence.
- Tat-chan? - My friend up from the bench where he sat with his eyes wide. Do not blame him for 2 years ...that not even a phone.
- Hi - my particular smile accompanied my greeting, spreading it, making it too me smile.
- I can not believe it!
came to me with arms outstretched and a look of happiness I had never seen in him. She hugged me closely, and I could feel the shock that caused him my arrival.
He asked me to wait a few minutes as I finished changing and so were going to take something out there.
I waited at the door of the clubhouse while watching the sky.
had returned to one of thenicest summers hauling Japan, though, of course, I had missed the previous two.
Jin left the club with a dress and handbag. I could not help but notice that everything he wore was most excellent marks to the handbag.
- You is going very well? - Asked fearing sound rude. He smiled carefree.
- No detail escapes you. Huh? - Pulled back hair and for the first time I looked inquiringly.
I was afraid ... I knew that questions would sprout a second now ... do not know what to do to divert your attention to securcute, n.
- How are the others? - Threw up the question with some stuttering.
I was amazed at how quickly emotions passed over his face. First a pinch of horror crossed his face, disengaging the act of concentration that I was spending, adjusting inquiry into his brain. Then, a deep pain ran through the corner of his lips meeting your eyes, and that feeling lasted a second longer than the last. And finally, reassembled with a hint of guilt his polite interest in me.
- they're fine. Changed a lot in these 2 a & amp; about girls, you you were not Tat-chan .- I said with a calm voice, though I noticed some skepticism on it.
- Yes? But, for better or for worse?
- only changed in any way special.
placating a time I concentrated my desire to dig more because he sensed that I was hiding something in June. He frowned a bit
breast. That gesture had started to make me hate someone did not stand that.
- What? - Asked annoying.
- Noto ... that you too have changed.
- You think? - Though I sat í to perfectly.
- Yes, of course. By the way I look, I would say that no detail escapes you what I think. When did you become so insightful?
I laughed to myself. Of course he had developed that gift. But to think why and how I made the blood freeze, a feeling that, over time, had been controlled, if not I had left since. I shook my head imperceptibly
that Jin would not notice, removing the memory from my mind.
- You have a penetrating gaze, is no longer the dreamer before .- said my friend, tray & eacute; ndome to reality and the present.
- May be ... - was all he said.
walked a little further in silence. Brain could hear the guy next to me which of accommodating all was the most urgent questions in undress.
- Let's go here .- interrupted his thoughts.
- Agreed. Oh, maybe something we stop for a moment .- I said, blushing slightly.
but did not realize until both were in the center of that cafe.
The whispers came on all at the same time as if someone had turned on the radio and had left with the minimum volume. CHTMLThen XC teenage girls stood from his chair and came towards us hesitant.
- Etto ... Akanishi-san? - Started one. I noticed he was gathering all the value it had in the body to speak .- Could you ...? - And came up a notebook pequeñoy a pen.
"Oh" was all I thought. Of course ... Jin had become a star player. But I could not stop to amaze me.
After that, more girls took courage and approached him.
I walked away laughing and sat at one table aeSpero.
She looked distressed, but could not wipe the smile that framed her lips. He loved all that was most visible.
After a while, apologized to his audience and came up to me to sit in front.
- Does this happen often? - Asked as a waitress coming towards us.
- Uhm ... pretty.
The employee did not stop looking at it with a smile and a wonderful face all the while he had the letter in his hand. Was to brazen his way of behaving, but I thought this kind of attitude fit well with my friend.
requested by the two and returned the letter gui & ntilde; Andol an eye. That was very pleased with the waitress.
talked a little bit of fame and how was his life now, so different as I remembered.
- Before we were immature .- .- said we were interested only go out and have fun, Kame and I lived only for Saturday night. The only thing he longed for in life was to pass all my exams in order to have a holiday free of teachers. It was more than an immature, was an idiot .- laughed at himself, and laughter came to me.
- How is Kame? Do you keep in touch with him? - I said without thinking... And then I regretted having asked the question. It was dangerous to get into the subject of others, dangerous to me.
- Yes Well, maso less. With my type of work is hard to find with time. You came right after a tournament, so it is the season of "rest" .- I understood his sarcasm and actually never stopped practicing .- But when we both have time we get together, and sometimes we & hellip , provided that the other day did not have party .- twisted mouth, down in truth they never really have much time .- Well, that's the job.
- Y ho you are unemployed? Sorry I came without warning.
- Do not worry, I have only to go to ... Uhm ... do not worry, I just have a site wrath, but I will not take.
- I see ...
His face had become very tense, but I did not press him to talk.
- What makes Kame? - I could not help it. I was prepared to suppress any questions about them ... but, with Jin in front of me and so inclined to tell what he knew ... I could not against my genius.
- Prepare for the "Star" .- and his smile broadened as I thoughtwill leave his face.
Is preparing for the All-Star? ... had to be kidding.
saw my expression and it started to laugh.
- It's no joke, it's true ... came into the majors for 6 months, and his team has been appointed to compete.
I looked at him, aware that my face must have been of pure bewilderment.
- Are you serious?! - Jin shouted and laughed.
- Sure! Do you come with your eyes closed? There are posters all over his face makes the ads para "Weider-in Jelly."
- Really? - I was surprised by my level of autism. Yes he had walked the streets ... but could not remember any poster.
- Go Tat-chan ... there mine took me to make commercials Russ-k.
- anyone say I should have noticed that ...
My friend returned to his eyebrows together. As even doing that I would get an attack of hysteria.
- What? - The shortcut.
- Well, I can not worry ... Tatsuya ... Where have you been?
thanked thesound of my heart were a sound foreign to others, as it had been shot like a hummingbird. I gasped. Lying
had to lie, lie blatantly lie and it was now. But the sudden acceleration of my pulse and not let me KO was a lie that sounded rhetorically coherent. Jin
noticed I was taking time to respond, and was startled when to lift my eyes filled with tears found.
- What Tat-chan?
not answered, not finding what to say, and because I could not open his mouth. CHTMLI felt as heat XC crowded in my face, which contrasted with my cold tears to spill down my cheeks. Jin
took my hand, which was closer to him. But let go at once to remember that he was surrounded by fans. "Pathetic" I did think about my hazy mind.
I got up and felt the hot face, burning eyes, cold heart, and nausea in the stomach.
spent like a fireball in front of the waitress finally brought our order.
cursed when I heard the footsteps of my friend behind m & iacute;.
I kept walking until the tears I rattled the vision. I felt
Jin's hand on my shoulder, turning slowly.
I waited for a new question, but instead embraced me.
Instead of calming my sobs, made it worse, is that in the bottom of my heart I knew his arms were not the ones I needed. Not needed him, not queríaa him or wanted him consolation.
- Let .- I heard he said, but the sound felt like it was passing over a very long time.
- No.
- Tatsuya, come with me.
When I opened my eyes a taxi parked winged ours.
was impossible, this image could not be true after 2 full years of denying me my life and my self. But it appeared that they had cleared enough my past memories, and Jin's room was so like the time we went to high school, that I shrank the stressed shell , n.
I just do not fit into the picture was a crown of flowers was great, and snow-white flowers, but could not say what kind of flowers. I caught a chill, like a funeral arrangement.
Mi friend came back from the kitchen with a large glass of water. I figured I was afraid of both mourn dehydrated ... or was it a sports setting, I did not care.
not accepted when I handed it to me, and knitting for the third time Miss, which made my breathing is agitated for a moment, it rested on the small table that had the center of habitacióny sat beside me.
lost count of the seconds spent looking at me when I counted more than three minutes. I closed my eyes momentarily
puffing furiously.
- You do berRangers you want ... but you will not go until we talk. Tatsuya I'm no fool, do not think I realized early on that were fleeing the subject.
- What are those flowers? - Asked weird.
- There is nothing ... a gift .- he said looking down a bit.
- seem funeral ...
- I do not change the subject Tatsuya!
I refused to talk about it ... I knew if I played the theme bleed to death, a crack open my chest, and memories I rip off the heart root. There was, or wanted, to walk past ... all I REFER í aa long, he was sick that my senses, I was lost in a sea of silence instantly lose sanity.
Jin leaned his elbow on the table and watched me more closely. He would not give up, you know.
- married .- Junno suddenly let go. I
hint of interest, but it would not fall into their game. I shrugged.
- With his girlfriend of a lifetime, do you remember? That skinny girl 2 º C, Mika.
remembered it was a simple and friendly girl, very typical for Junno. But I did not gesture at all.
- It was a great weddingthe room was great, and the food is really spent.
Again I ignore it and placed my view on the posters in his room, remained the same as 10 years ago ...
He followed the line of my and smiled.
- Some children, right? I do not get rid of them by pure melancholy.
I wondered how my room ... for sure my parents had been evicted, totally sure that would not return.
Jin returned to the task of observing.
- Koki, currently, nor is in the country .- .- He said fun to head up the idea of traveling.
Contrary to my intentions, I turned my head in amazement. Jin
more his smile broadened.
- I phoned a week ago, maso less, and said he was in New York, it's going great.
I raised an eyebrow. Married Junno, Koki travel baseball star Kame, Jin football hero, and ...
Again I felt a twinge, like a good punch right in the middle of the stomach. I hugged my legs and hid her head in my lap. WithSo Jin ruled out any other possibility, and he had no doubt where they came by my reactions. That clever way of making inferences.
- Tat-chan ... - called me .- When you hear?
"Heard? What?
- I know it was the best we could have done was something very stupid.
my friend's words were just getting more confused. And I do not want to think, I did not think he could not permitírmelo, would be the end of my sanity.
chuckled. I could not see his expression, so I did not know what kind of feeling attributed the gesture.
There was silence ... and although I flayed for not biting your hook, the uncertainty was eating my nervous system.
picked up a rare sight at the boy and I was petrified. Cried.
understood then that the crack had been to himself, in way of reproach.
- Why are you crying? - My voice was rough so attached to my throat I had it.
My friend looked at me could not believe it. The exasperation in her eyes whipping my face, clearing the mind momentarily.
be reassembled quickly wiping away tears. When I looked back a sparkle in his eyes told me he had noticed something.
- Listen, I need you to tell me what happened that day. What you just said.
I cringed and felt dizzy when my pulse is fired again.
No. Oh, no. No, no. I did not want to remember ...
But the strength of my pain was not strong enough to aplacquering the impending recall.
FLASHBACK
I came for an extraordinarily early faculty, that made me very happy, I liked it when improvising something.
was standing, leaning on a lamppost. Still had that aura dark haunted him for weeks, did not remember well the day the darkness she had come to his eyes as well.
took me softer than ever from the waist when I was around his neck, and he said more dam kissingility and softness than mine, hungry for it. I wondered why he was so careful.
He smiled with his mouth, but the gesture did not come to your eyes. Then I took her hand and started walking.
- What are we doing today? - I asked excitedly.
- Whatever you want, today everything is at your choice .- I said. I felt fatigue in his voice.
- Really? - The simple fact that I had the choice of what we would open up the imagination.
I looked at the peace embodied in the face and I caught securcute;, calming my fears to take every minute of the day.
He bent slightly to kiss her forehead, a shiver ran down my body, had ice cream.
I bit my lower lip in token of my apremiación. And had asked repeatedly if anything happened, and he always drew importance to the matter with his usual sweetness cortesíay ... going to make it go crazy.
I decided I wanted to spend the whole day at an amusement park, was so sudden whim, I thought Yuichi would be denied, but gladly accepted, though of course he will not put & iacuteand, to a foot on the roller coaster.
Honestly, the day passed too quickly. Yucci had not been away from me one iota, nor let go of my hand, and seemed reluctant to leave the park when I asked if it was boring.
meditating I discovered many times, his earnestness intrigued me and I was afraid, he used to do those things ... and if did, tried to share their thoughts with me.
The sun was down when I finally get tired of walking through the park. And way out the door I could not resist, especially when I noticed that I PresTabto care, something very unlike him.
- Yucci .- I called for me to attend.
- What? - Said turning his face to me, pretending, and very pathetic, a carefree smile.
- I can ask you something? And you must be 100% honest with me.
looked forward for a moment, then whispered.
- I'll try.
That was bad, he had never said "I'll try."
I have closed the stomach.
- Yucci What's happening? ... And do not say "anything & rdquoo;.
sighed, and the decision was reflected in her eyes.
- I was thinking a lot lately ...
- Yes, I noticed.
- Tatsuya ...
He stopped a few meters outside the park and looked at me frowning.
It looked somewhat angry, but did not understand why he did not remember doing anything that might make him angry.
- We ... no, I'm not quite sure what we are doing .- said slowly, softly.
- I do not understand, what do you mean?
- I think ... we're wearing ...
That made no sense, a month ago, she still had not reached that black aura, we were having our best time, we leave to spend the days together, and having fun as a kind of partner happy. His words had no consistency, I loved him more than ever.
- I do not agree with you Yucci .- I spoke.
- Tatsuya, I said it was reciprocal, the problem is me.
I felt a lump in my throat ... Why his words sounded to me ...?
- Me ... you're leaving? - Hinted in a choked voice, although I slipped a note of grace, because it sounded stupidoe unlikely.
- Yeah ... - I thought his sentence for approval to drop the ax of the guillotine on me. It was a death sentence.
- What? Do not play with that ... not funny.
He ran a hand through his disheveled hair.
- I'm not playing Tatsuya. We must part.
I refused to accept that, not without a good explanation.
- Why? - Demanded.
- Ya ... no ... no I love you.
While we were surrounded by people and noise, I suddenly felt totally alone, and a Silentio flooded the atmosphere.
He was still frowning, still seemed angry.
- Are you serious?
- Yes
- But ... how ...? Did I do something wrong?
shook his head as let go of my hand.
No. I did not like that ...
- So, tell me a reason that made you stop loving me.
- There is ... no other person.
lied, Nakamaru never been good lying.
- Does anyone else? That's not true, you know.
- Tatsuya, no longer get my words right .- I am rebuked &p; oacute; .- I'm telling the truth.
But it was not my fault, I was in my body refute anything said Yuichi after hurt, it did not seem possible that kind of intention on their part.
- Are you sure this is what you want?
END OF FLASHBACK
While memories were crowding one after the other, I told the story whispered Jin as requested.
At the end, my mind was about to break, but I forced myself to stay a moment longer in the sanity to watch my friend.
is room í of clutching his head in his hands, and ruffled hair.
I felt numb, as if remembering what happened I would have stayed the senses.
- We have to go somewhere .- said suddenly. And my mental state was not right to get to discuss anything.
All I could do is see how he took the carefully arranging flowers, came up to me and pulled me by the wrist.
When we left his house was totally dark. Halted another taxi and forced me to go, fate did not even listen when I told the driver. Jin
seemed very nervous, anxious glances threw me constantly ... I guess I was hoping que to collapse, or sudden thought my peace was a stupid facade that would break at any time. But the truth was that there was no facade, I was in limbo ... but I was sure it would not last for much longer.
The taxi stopped in front of a white wall, or so it was all my brain caught.
I drove down and held my wrist while walking on the sidewalk.
did not notice where we were until I saw an object of marble that I sparked curiosity. A cross.
I looked around and saw it was full of those crosses, marbleand had also granite.
As I crawled around the place, saw thousands of chapels, whose interior was dark.
I had been there before ...
Jin turned a corner and the chapels were left behind, followed by a whole row of ... ... tombstones?
large eyes opened when he finally fell where we were. Why
had brought me to a cemetery?
I released her wrist and walked alone. I was standing where I left off. I had my surprisecho react. I looked at my trembling hands and found out why shaking? A cold wind ruffled my hair.
I looked at my friend with the look, and later saw him putting the field on one of the tombstones. I beckoned, so I went to him.
was stiff as a statue, the moon reflecting its light on his pale complexion and white shirt, making it shine, almost like a ghost.
- Who let the industry? - Asked. Like any response
said the stone was in front of us.
was white, made of granite bright, and very new, had a year at most.
I was surprised that Jin had found a place to put the wreath, as it was filled with floral motifs, as if every soul in Japan had come to leave a gift.
I bent her winged to see the writing.
"Cruel" ... that was the only word that crossed my brain when I read the contents of the plate. Jin was the most cruel in this world, that there was no doubt.
unnerves me and looked upset.
cried. My anger evaporated
& hellip; then there was ... Was this for real?
I looked back the stone.
No ... of course not ... of course not.
Yuichi Nakamaru said I knew it, but ...
Jin placed a hand on my shoulder, but there was no body to comfort, no soul that contain ... I had left the cemetery .
not remember how, but again we were in his room.
not remember having changed, and I jumped into his bed. I assume that was the grace of Jin. I do not know
& ea qucute, when I began to mourn, perhaps I was crying when we left the cemetery, but I realized just now noticing it was the pillow soaked from my friend. He was on his side, and I could see me sitting in a winged chair. It seemed a visit to a patient in a hospital. Be
unconsciously thought I knew it ... but the pain did not reach my body because my brain and my soul were not there ... I was not aware. Was broken, so broken, do not even perceive what was happening around me ... I was going crazy.
There were pieces of me that together, because I hadhas lost all ... each and every one of them.
I fell asleep without even noticing.
When I awoke, Jin was sleeping next to me.
I turned to get in front of Ele, inevitably, I started to mourn once again. This time, had recovered my senses, my soul had found its way back to my body and my brain began again leaving the picture very clear, so clear and simple as devastating.
I hugged her torso, not fall to pieces again.
He awoke with a start something, but then I returned the hug stroking theback.
- How? - I forced myself to say between sobs.
- I had a terminal illness ... I knew a month before you were.
seizure Despite the pain that was ravaging my chest, I made an effort to think and remember.
The black aura ... his face constantly worried.
remembered her frowning in anger ... and then I understood ...
Anger was to himself, by their actions, their lies, the pain that I produce.
all made sense.
- I lied to protect, so that you odiases ... but now I see youyou can not hate him.
- I went ... I went because I thought that was what he wanted ... and I could not say goodbye ... ...
- I know, it was not his best decision ...
- Was it yesterday? - And his breath let me know that entendíaa what I meant.
- Yes .. 1 year was fulfilled exactly.
A year ... a year ago he was dead.
- I left something, something he thought would give you a day after his death, but you did not come back until today. I let
and went to the dresser drawer where he had a little box. Took out a folded piece of paper and handed it to me.
- I'll give you privacy .- I said, and left the room.
My hands were shaking so much I thought it would break the blade. Deep breath and held back tears.
"Tatsuya:
I am writing this letter as a last resort to be honest.
I have no forgiveness or sympathy that I deserve these had; Ndome now.
But I was wrong.
You left, you left us to go to take your pain elsewhere, to drown your past elsewhere, to erase from your memory the moment I broke your corazóny raped your sanity, leaving you with a glimmer of hope, happiness.
I saw a few days before your departure. I could not recognize ... I could not find in you the Tatsuya I knew I could not see your smile, your eyes bright, your presence so happy and pure... And I understood that he had shattered MI Tat-chan, I had sudo.
I can not continue to explain in words how much I hated myself ... and when I tried to remedy my mistake, it was too late. You were gone.
You left, leaving the unconscious last memory of my actions, my bad decisions, and the mental picture of a person I knew it was you, but which, however, was not ... sorry as having corrupted all your soul.
write this in hopes you can read it soon because I can not stand my life knowing that your alter ego, MI Tat-chan, is trapped within this new being.
I can only tell you the truth at all, is the least you deserve.
I love you, I love you now, I loved you before and there'll still love you wherever you go. I'm not afraid of death, just something that should happen and we can not escape.
I leave with the certainty that I will find the other side, and so we meet again, and be the Tatsuya always loved, which had not hurt and the happiness that exuded every pore of his body.
And that's the image I'll definitely when I close my eyes ... your happy smile, which I have devoted every day of our relationship. CHT
MLXC Eternally yours.
Yuichi "
I dropped the paper to one side when I could no longer withstand the shocks of tears. mentally cursed the gods for letting me know that taken away, for doing away from me this way. But Yucci was right with what he said his letter, he was eternally mine, and I was waiting on the other side ... I expected and I had no strength to be separated from him. Ext
.
escaped Jin's room through her window, she could not waste time, and I knew if I looked into his eyes courage is going to dilute knew I knew what to do ... ; to that neighborhood and knew of the existence of a deep and fast ríoa little there.
My mind went back to give me sanity when I was standingover the railing of the bridge that was on the holy river in precarious balance. It did not matter ... I could live with the idea that he was alive and happy, with someone else, but ultimately happy. But I could not live, not after knowing that it was all a lie and that he loved me. And would not live another minute without it. and impregnated with security in the face, knowing he would be waiting for me wherever it was, I jumped.
Smiling, offering his arms and telling me not's name. Do not hesitate, and went straight to it, as the water entered my airways, making it impossible to breathe, but willingly embraced death, which I transportaríaa the Yuichi arms, and I never volveríaa away from it.
FIN
not think I was easy, it took me more than it seems; ___ ; I, Taw, quye broke one of the rules, but still no ... I speak of love not corresponddo. Well, never specify what kind of unrequited love ... if unrequited love for another person or unrequited love for another reason the destination xD I hope I have broken the rule too = /
Anyway, hope you like it n_n Well, everyone else you XD ia
Comment or die> 8D
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